That's Offensive...I think...



Here's how the move went down - it was cra-shizzle...

Day 1 - actually, let's back the bus up - Saturday before day 1 - 6 or 7 of my best friends came over for what I declared as about "an hour's worth of loading".  Sha-right.  About 5 hours later we were almost done.  Our house was trashed - literally.  The only things left in the house were garbage and an air mattress.  OMG - my body hurt so much!

Note to anyone moving - Forget u-haul, forget pods, forget 2 guys in a truck - they are all overpriced.  We used ABF U-Pack it and the money we saved allowed us to get movers on the other end to move our stuff out of the trailer into our new apartment.  ABF has it's pros and cons, mainly that you must have a place to drop the trailer on both ends and don't even think about the cubes unless you currently live in a shed or the like.  Your best and only bet is to go with the trailer.  It's a great deal.  You only pay for what you use and the rates are very affordable.  Instead, you could choose the other companies and while you're at it, why don't you just spend the rest of your money on mail order brides.  Duh...

So...

Day 1 - We got in the car and let me reiterate that sleeping on an air mattress only works when you're making like Blair Witch or something.  An air mattress in an empty room is horrible.  #1 - It's freezing.  Try sleeping on it - you'll literally think you're an eskimo.  I didn't know if I was ready for a blizzard or bed.  #2 - even worse is an air mattress on hard woods - the thing is literally moonwalking across the floor while we're sleeping.  I'm like - is this an air mattress or a turbo flyer?  On a positive note, we were already half way to the car by the time we woke up.

We got up at the crack of dawn - actually it was still dark outside when we woke up and I'm happy to report it was a balmy 17 degrees.  With an absence of sweat on my brow and the defrost on full blast we backed out of the driveway for the last time.  I don't get sentimental about most inanimate objects, but there is something to be told about all of the struggles we had in building our house and getting everything we wanted in it.  There were battles, fights, and there was no giving in.  Perhaps that's a good topic for the next blog, but for now, we were ambling down to the interstate and on our way.  

If you've never traveled for 4 consecutive days in a car with a "large" dog, then I'm not sure there is anything I can say to prepare you for what you are going to experience.  Side bar - according to all of the designations out west, Sammie is known as a "large" dog.  Don't worry - we're all properly offended.

In any event, we drove for about 12 hours and stopped just west of Jackson, MS.  It was a really cool drive and by someone's insistence (read: barking and slobber) we stopped about every 2 hours.  On a positive note, that made the trip much more doable because you're always a maximum of 120 minutes away from stopping and stretching.  I had never been west of Atlanta in the car, so there was a lot to see.  On the way, we decided that Blood Gnome would visit all of the "welcome" centers.  The best was on our way into Mississippi, there were 2 ladies at the desk next to the clock in shape of a state.  I told Jill to ask the ladies if they would pose with Blood Gnome and they did.  The picture was priceless because the one lady was smiling and the other was like - get this crap over with and get your sorry east coast/west coast wannabe butts out of our cotton-pickin state...If you look closely at the picture, she is ready to break the Gnome in half. In the vein of this is insanely ridiculous - I'ma tryin' ta do my state proud an'a I get these yayhoos comin' in with this stupid troll wanting a picture...

YIKES!

~Day 2 Tomorrow ~